just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Randomize
