the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
Randomize
