Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
Your cat ate my taco.
. . . I don't have a cat?
It was laying in your bed. Now it's hunting for more tacos.
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