First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
MIDGETS
????
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
I think my moral compass just broke
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
Randomize
