i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
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