i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
Randomize
