He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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