Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
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