He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
