Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
