I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
Randomize
