Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
you can officially check off peeing off the 5th floor while shouting "I want to break the guinness world record for longest piss stream" off your college to do list.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
You insisted that your middle name was "velociraptor" for 20 minutes and every time someone said something you tried to relate it to velociraptors. That kind of drunk.
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
Randomize
