dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
I farted in his bed and then in my drunken stupor grabbed hair defanging spray to cover up the stench.
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize