Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
Randomize
