hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
I just sang Hey Jude with a homeless man and then we drank beer together. Then I watched asians take pictures under a xmas tree for an hour and fell asleep in an MGM Grand bathroom stall. #AloneinVegas
pray to the hookup gods
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
did i just pee glitter
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
Randomize
