Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
Randomize
