meet me in the bathroom in 10 mins.
wait what? who are you hooking up with in the bathroom?!
aww shit wrong text.
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
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