I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
MY LIFE IS A TRAINWRECK THATS ON FIRE BUT SOMEHOW STILL MOVING, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM OUTSIDE AT 2AM
Randomize
