gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
I'm eating oreos and watching porn. This is your fault.
Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
You can't just snapchat me a picture of a pregnancy test and then not answer your phone
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
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