Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
Randomize
