She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
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