you turned your livingroom into a bong?
he thought i was a dude.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
This dudes playing guitar and singing outside our window and he's like "ravioli is beterrrrrrr than tortelliniIii cause tortelliniiii is shaped like fucking ears"
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana