what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
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