Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
I'm like, not good at living.
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
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