I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
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