no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
