Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
