Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
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