White coat. Heels.
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
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