I just ate a drumstick out of the garbage. I need a life coach.
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
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