I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
I never thought that at some point in my life I would end up in the back of a cop car dressed as Pumba #HakunaMatata
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
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