What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
I woke up to an email from Groupon for 3 laser lipo treatments...on Valentine's Day...way to kick me when I'm down Groupon.
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
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