I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
