glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
Randomize
