I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
I checked into jail on foursquare
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
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