If that was your dad, he is hot
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
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