I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
When i was leaving for work this morning, i realized the neighbor was passed out drunk, with no pants, and a half eaten whopper on my lawn. Knowing that hey..we have all been there before.. i decided to give him a pillow and a blanket rather than wake him up.
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
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