We won't sleep together?
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
Randomize
