Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Randomize
