The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
My key broke off while I was turning the key. I can't pull the broken key out. Not only am i locked outside, so is the rest of the building.
so I think he was half asleep, but he woke me up by saying "where's my cow? Is it being shipped?" He must have been dreaming about farmville..
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
i ran into my coworkers when i was walking home last night. i was shirtless. i think i gave my shirt to Walter. he's a cat.
im still drunk. birthday week begins.
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
Randomize
