ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
I pour the whiskey from now on
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
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