C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
It's never too late to be topless.
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
Randomize