I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
Randomize