i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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