Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
home. puking in laundry basket.
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
Randomize
