You're completely useless in the revolution.
Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
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