i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
Randomize
