well most of my day revolves around power hour
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
Randomize
