You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
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