it hurts more in the daytime
So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
Randomize
