is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
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