Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
Randomize
